Confidence. It’s like a drug.

Once you get a taste of that rush – that feeling that makes you feel like you can do anything – you want more.
When the confidence wears off (and it always does) we come down from its high in a hard, heart-breaking crash.
Suddenly it’s over. And all of its powers vanished – gone as quickly as they came.

And then the hunt begins.

You start wondering to yourself, “where has my confidence gone?”
You lie awake at night, bug-eyed and confused about the last place you left it; you wonder who is responsible for its disappearance. And that’s when the accusations begin to fly:

“My boss stole my confidence”
“My ex robbed me of every last bit of confidence I had”
“My friend borrowed my confidence, but didn’t give it back”

Blame. It’s a stage we experience once the confidence fades. But be cautious – this is just a rouse – losing confidence will make you paranoid; it makes our index finger razor sharp, ready to be pointed in the direction of the nearest person who feels bigger and stronger than you do. But doing this will only make your confidence fade faster, for you are giving “the other” the power that you need so much. Tread lightly.

When your stash of confidence runs low, be weary of the company you keep. Stay in close contact with those who will share their personal reserve of confidence with you. They are out there. Keep them close. And ask a lot of questions – they may know where you can find more.

Like I said, confidence is a drug, and everybody wants some.

So, where to find your confidence again? Who deals this stuff in copious amounts?

Well, surprise, dear friend, you’re the dealer.

You begin to recall that it was you who hid your confidence, in an effort to preserve it and keep it safe. But, I’m here to tell you that this is not how confidence breeds itself – if hidden and stifled this way, it will fade.

The only way to make more confidence is to enjoy it’s high; thrive on its pleasure. But beware not to flaunt what you have it in abundance. Nobody likes a show-off.

There are thieves who may want a piece of your confidence and will attempt to steal your reserve. Don’t be angry – these thieves are human, too; they feed on the confidence of others, unable to find their own. But don’t let these bottom-feeders scare you – they are in your way for a reason: To remind you that your personal brand of confidence is like a sweet, savory prime-rib – only the very best – and everybody wants some.

And then you remember that your confidence is the shit. The Cat’s Meow.

So go strongly and with determination in the direction of your confidence. It’s waiting for you, hiding under your box of insecurities and bag of self-doubt – dig, dig! It’s there! Keep digging. And when you find it again (and you will) and you recognize it’s texture, taste and smell, don’t hold back – bite into it, get hungry; you’ve been waiting for this.

Digest.

Now write down these directions, should you lose your confidence again. Remember it’s fleeting – this makes its value high. But next time you’ll know the way back to it… you’ll remember where you left it, buried deep down inside.