…and the best part?

MY AUNT MADE THIS!

She’s so incredibly talented. When I was a kid, she painted and sketched. Throughout my entire life, she’s always had a camera in one hand, the person in the family who manages to wrangle everyone with ease, so that she can take no less than five pictures to capture what she feels will be a moment we’ll want to remember some day. She’s always thinking of others like that. And I love her. And her amazing cake.

sandy.

ps: just got an email from a reader – yes, the entire thing is edible! isn’t that cool? the computer, briefcase, calculator, coffee mug, iphone & donut…takes “life is delicious” to a new level.

Anyway, if you’re into the Oscars and think watching it on the big screen would be up your alley, the Revue Cinema will be broadcasting it live on February 26 at 7 p.m.. Sounds like a good night waiting to happen if you ask me: popcorn smell, retro theater surroundings and movie geeks all in one room, in harmony.

So sweet.

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Have you heard something like that at your office before? Shit, I sure have.

There is this one phrase, I am ashamed to say, that has been a staple in my office lingo for years. I don’t think I’ll use it again after seeing it on the Douchey Account Guy blog though, where you can read more just like it.

sandy.

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I’m amazed at how many body parts are on Pinterest these days – body parts – with captions like “I wish I had an ass like this”. Not just pillows or cashmere throws or photos of homes that we can’t afford but wish we could… lush, round bottoms are also a hot ticket item on women’s minds, apparently.

I found this image above on a couple of boards and was like, “Really?”

It’s a gorgeous ass, don’t get me wrong, but, after a few years as a fitness journalist, I have to break the news to you, ladies: genetics gives you an ass like this, not exercise.

Yes, you can lift and tone and tighten your bum to look rounder and fuller, not doubt, but unless you’re born with it, you just won’t get it.

If that makes you sad, I think, maybe, you should ask yourself, “Am I prepared to squat and lunge until I barf, so that I can even come close to having an ass like that?” Because, seriously, that’s what it takes…and, even then, no guarantees.

I’m not judging or trying to make you upset (if you are feeling this way), but it’s a question I’m asked often: how can I change my body? And lately, I’ve started saying, “girl, change your attitude first – the body will follow”.

sandy.

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you’re welcome.

Just so you know, the photo above is not my tattoo. Although mine is a peony.

When asked by friends, “why do you get tattoos?” (which I think is both a good and fair question) I’ve come to say that, simply, I like the experience: enduring the nervousness right before the buzzing needle touches skin; the imminent pain that follows, for hours; the way the mind wanders and the body stiffens as adrenaline rushes to save you; everything – your skin, bones, heart and mind – working together to make this less painful; the subsequent recovery and self-care; the acceptance that there is something permanent in my life now.

I like it all.

And all I have to do is lay around and wait for it to be done. It’s an experience that can’t quite be duplicated. That’s why.

Do you have tattoos? What do you like about getting them? I’m curious. Comment or email, I’d like to know.

I like to listen to music when I write. Yesterday, on the radio, I half-heard the words to “I Was Born To Be Blue”, by Ella Fitzgerald. Written and composed by Mel Torme, it’s the lyrics that had an impact on me, even though I was only slightly tuned in:

“Some folks were meant to live in clover,
But they are such a chosen few
And clover being green is something I’ve never seen
Cause I was born to be blue

When there’s a yellow moon above me,
They say there’s moonbeams I should view
But moonbeams being gold are something I can’t behold
Cause I was born to be blue

When I met you the world was bright and sunny
When you left the curtain fell
I’d like to laugh but nothing strikes me funny
Now my world’s a faded pastel

Well, I guess I’m luckier than some folks,
I’ve known the thrill of loving you
And that alone is more than I was created for
Cause I was born to be blue”

We are who we are, in and out of love, every day. And, baby, some of us are meant to be  blue. That may sound melancholy or hopeless, but I hope not. Because the point is, you can’t fight who you are; but if you can make the best of it and accept what you have to work with, incredible things happen. Like this love song.

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Check out Writer’s Inner Journey, especially this page.

“Words are but the images of matter;

and except that they have live of reason and invention;

to fall in love with them is all one as to fall in love with a picture.”

-Francis Bacon, The Advancement of Learning (1605), Book I, IV.3

The quote at the start of my new textbook, for a creative writing course I’m enrolled in at the University of Toronto. I like to take one every few months so that I don’t fall into a trap and start to hate writing. Because when something you love becomes work, it can be a slippery slope if you don’t catch yourself sometimes. You have to make sure your heart’s still in it. I think that’s really, truly important.

Class number two tonight. I’ll report back.

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p.s., 14 more “Shit People Say” videos. OBSESSED.