In one month and one day, I will be 30. And somehow, this month before the big day weighs heaviest on my shoulders, even above the day itself.
There is still work to be done.
I’ve always been a girl who likes to work under pressure. This is probably why being an editor at a magazine appealed to me so much – I love a challenge and, for me, time presents the greatest challenge of all to us mere mortals, wouldn’t you say?
From the time I was competing in figure skating at nine, my coach noticed it right away – I performed best under pressure. I would work hard and carefully – jumping, spinning, figure-8′ing – all season, trying to perfect my solo routine – I knew every cue in my music, every glitch in the song (we used tapes back then) and every note that coincided with the jumps I dreaded most. And, even though I loved knowing the details, I sometimes felt overwhelmed by them and I’d start to panic. Yes, even at nine.
It was too much sometimes and, although I never quit trying, there were days I retreated to my bedroom to sulk and cry after a particularly bad day on my skates. “Why can’t I do it!?” I would scream, as I pounded up the stairs of our family home to my bedroom. I would scour under the covers, cry for a few minutes into my pillow and then, I would just lie there, and wait.
Within a few hours – after Beverly Hills 90210 reruns and episodes of Married with Children, accompanied by a chicken soup from mom – I would emerge from the depths of my bedroom and tormented young mind only to feel like there was still some fight left in me. “Wait until I get back on that ice”, I would say to my mom as she dropped off my tray of pitty-soup and ‘I love you no matter what’ crackers. She knew, no matter how bad my day was on the ice, I was determined to keep pushing until I was satisfied. Even at nine, my mom trusted me that much – she knew that sadness and sense of defeat would never last long. Whether she was just a proud mother who refused to believe she raised her daughter to give up or a parent simply humbled by her daughter’s frustration, looking back, her faith in me has done wonders for my self-esteem. In times of hurt, anger or confusion in my life, having my mother know I’ll pull through makes me believe that I can. (yes, even though she drives me absolutely nuts in the process of it all.)
And so, as I near the end of my List (and, therefore, my birthday) here are the things that are giving me a little bit of pressure and a lot of motivation to get shit done…
A recap and a few cross offs:
1. Sky dive
Cliche, sure, but it’s on here! In fact, it’s been on my list since age 25. No kidding. I most definitely want to be part of the club that’s jumped out of a small airplane, 3,000 feet in the air, with nothing more than a thin layer of synthetic material ushering me safely to the ground. Ya, sign me up.
**I’ve handed this booking over to my family – the last time my family pulled together to gift me with something tremendous was for my wedding – my beloved dress and the fact that they were all there, for me, on a beach in Mexico was a dream come true. I don’t tell them that often enough, but it’s true. So, I’d love nothing more than the same three – mom, dad, sister – to be the ones who make jumping from 10s of thousands of feet in the air another supreme reality for me. (mom has already booked the day off to watch. August 19.)
2. Get my motorcycle license (the “M1″)
I love riding around on scooters on vacation. It’s time to bring a little of that back home. I really want to boot around the city in a shiny new Vespa.
**Silly excuses! The handbook I should have read weeks ago has been buried in a box somewhere since the move. If I don’t book my course and test by the end of today, I’m dead meat. And, even though I can’t quite get together enough scratch to actually purchase a Vespa this year, I’d like to have that license in my wallet as an incentive to save up for one.
4. Visit a Canadian city that’s not Montreal
With so many beautiful cities just a car ride away there is no reason not to see a city in my own backyard. And no, Montreal does not count. (I lived there very briefly one summer).
**Dear Rob, our credit card will be taking care of this one for me (us?). I’d love a cottage by the sea, peace and quiet and more seafood than one gal can stand. I was hoping for PEI or Newfoundland, but I’ll settle for any old city that’s just not Toronto or Montreal. fyi.
5. Shape up…more
I work out on the regular, but I want to stand naked in front of a mirror on my thirtieth birthday and say, “damn girl, nice ass!” and really, really mean it. I was a competitive figure skater as a teenager and know what being “in shape” feels like. But I want to top that.
**My personal trainer, BigV, nearly killed me a month ago. Then I started my one-month long yoga training, which was INTENSE on the body and mind. I texted my trainer today and I’ll be back on the V-train early next week. Game on. He makes love my butt and hamstrings like no other.
7. Finish “chapter one”
I’ve written a version of “chapter one” a dozen times, but have never finished. I’m addicted to multi-tasking. What I really need to do is just sit, turn off my BlackBerry, put the kybosh on Facebook, and write. (Wow, I almost didn’t finish this paragraph.)
**Ya, ya. I’m on it. Chapter one may be a short one, but it will be the best first chapter I’ve ever written. I can feel it… but it’ll be created under pressure, I just know it.
8. This blog
I want it to inspire others but most of all I want it to inspire me. Everyday. The “end date” is August 21, 2010.
**30 days + 1 to go!
9. Reinvent dinner
Take greasy, nasty, fatty, sloppy meals and “Cinderella” them. Once a week make over my favorite recipes into cleaner, healthier versions. I love doing this but have stopped since the move to the new apartment. Need to rekindle this love.
**Recipe post to come!
10. Love my skin
Once a week do something fabulous for my dermis. I hear my 30’s are the make or break decade for your skin. Buff it, exfoliate it, moisturize it, love it – it’s the only one I get.
**My skin-care regime in details to come!
11. Eat green everyday
Green foods are amazing. My research at my day job (I work as an editor for a fitness magazine. Seriously) reminds of this every day. I skip out on veggies way more than I know I should. For the next year eating ‘green’ will be a habit, even on the weekends.
**”Green Shake” recipe post to come!
There are are more, but just an update on these bad boys for now.
So, how’s your Birthday List coming?
9) Absolute snap – just use less fat/oil (look, I can fry 1/2lb of mushrooms in 1 tsp of oil), trim fat from red meats (including pork), and use skinless poultry. Substitute low-fat natural yoghurt for regular or “Greek”-style.
Serve dishes with baked potato, wholewheat pasta or brown rice instead of white Also ref rice, learn to cook it using the absorption technique. By volume mix 1 part rice and 2 parts water in a saucepan with a good lid. Bring to boil uncovered, then turn the heat down to min, cover (and do NOT uncover during cooking and cook for:-
Basmati – 12min
“American” long grain – 15min
Brown (aka unpolished) – 30min
Steam veg instead of boiling them.
11) Are you seriously claiming that, say, brocolli, is better for you than red capsicums, tomatoes or carrots!? Or than having a piece of fruit as your dessert?
wow wow wow… consider me IMPRESSED, sir.
I died a little when I read “city not Montreal”.
WANT TO GO TO NOVA SCOTIA? OR NUNAVUT?
Re. #4 – come to Halifax! :) Weather is great right now!
Hmmm, is that my friend, John?