My parents are still together, but my family has totally fractured or even crashed and burned over the last few years. In West Virginia, you tend to grow up alongside all your aunts, uncles, cousins, second cousins, etc. I’m an only kid, so my cousins are the closest things to siblings I have. So Christmas and all other major holidays were always HUGE for me, back then. On my mom’s side, we always had one of the guys dress up like Santa, just for us. We didn’t need to go to the mall :)

But it just unraveled. People lost jobs and felt like dirt because they couldn’t do this or that. Everyone was understanding, but unemployment hits like a ton of bricks on holidays. Mental illness and substance abuse reared their ugly heads quite often. Couples divorced. A grandparent on each side of family died. I made a disastrous move to Florida. More and more stopped showing up for family gatherings. Some gatherings have been canceled, altogether.

Christmas, Thanksgiving, Fourth of July and Labor Day come and go. Half the time, I’m now at work. If not, I’ll be at home watching “30 Rock” DVDs. If I do manage to get time off for Christmas and Thanksgiving, I’ll go to my parents’ place and chill with them for a while.

I’ve always wondered if it really just unraveled. Maybe it was just f***ed up from Day One, but everyone put on a brave game face for us because we were little kids. Maybe there was always a game face, but people had a harder time keeping it up as time passed.

Halloween is my favorite holiday now. It’s not a “family holiday”, so that means I can actually celebrate it with my friends. My second favorite is New Year’s Eve and for the same reason. I just like wearing costumes more :)

Thank you so much for posting this. I think the results are twofold. You get something off your chest and de-stress. Meanwhile, people like me — who didn’t grow up on a “Leave it to Beaver” episode — feel less like the gory car crash on the side of the highway at which no one can stop looking!

That floored me, reminding me of how much I miss home sometimes, despite not wishing to be there. My family are all as crazy as I am, although they have different ways of expressing it, but we are (just about) held together by some form of glue…as good as any reason to be thankful.

xo

Wow, 36 years? Now that’s standing the test of time. I love the advice about how every day is a new day. I’ve only been married for two years (together for 11) and, so far, keeping positive rings true. My husband is really great about that- I’ve learned a lot from him about seeing things on the brighter side, or at the very least searching for one.

Ehugs right back at you.

xo

Love you girl.

xo

Mince and tatties is a great dish when made properly; if I’m visiting my Canuck cousins I could prove it to you! (offer of cookery by someone that others describe as a good cook). The reason I won’t eat it on a ship any more is that it was my Dad’s favourite dish on ships, and it brings back memories…